Tuesday, December 30, 2008


I just wanted to give a quick hello to let everyone know Joseph is home. It has been so wonderful to have him here, all of us are on cloud nine and thoroughly enjoying getting loved on by Dada. Its a very short stay though, he leaves this coming Saturday to head back up to the base for his C school and will be there for 14 weeks. The boys and I are planning on following after him sometime around the 15th of January.

Please continue to keep my family in prayer. I know I have not been keeping everyone updated, but I know that most of the people that read this blog are living and breathing everything that is going on with my Aunt Christi and it has just been to hard to write about. After no change since the day of the seizure ( a heart attack was ruled out) and proof that she no longer has any brain activity going on, the incredibly hard decision to take her off of life support was made yesterday. The reality is that she left us two weeks ago when she slipped into a coma, but its still hard to reconcile the fact that she is gone. I do need to clarify that at this point we are just waiting for her body to pass away, but my Christi is gone. It is a very strange feeling to mourn someone when you know their body is still laying in a hospital bed breathing and doing all its basic functions, but needing to remember that the body is no longer the woman I loved. Please pray for me and my family as we say goodbye to someone we love. Pray for my grandparents who are having to watch their oldest child die, my mother and her sisters, Kim, Jaime and Kelly (my mom) and for Christi's husband Frank and her son Justin, along with everyone else I love and call family.

Ok, the tears are starting to threaten so I am out for tonight.


Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Seven Days People, Seven Days!


Ok, well technically I will be sitting in my hotel room twiddling my thumbs waiting for the night to pass so that I can get up at 5:30 in the morning to go sit in an auditorium for three hours before I finally even get to lay eyes on my hubby. But since tomorrow is only two hours away lets not get technical, especially since everyone will probably be reading this when it is officially tomorrow anyways :)

In other news my Aunt Christi could really use some prayer warriors right about now. Earlier this morning (so technically yesterday) she had a heart attack. When the paramedics arrived she was not breathing and her heart was not beating. She is now in the ICU in critical condition. Please pray for her health, for peace and strength for my family as they walk through this with her and also clear minds for her doctors and nurses. But most of all for my family (myself included) to put her in the Lords hands and trust that the Great Physician is the best doctor and decision maker she could have.

And to leave you all on a brighter note...


Thursday, December 11, 2008

Sweet Nothings

It is so wonderful to finally not be sick! Its amazing how easy life is when your not exhausted, cranky and generally feeling like poop. I mean this single mothering stuff is a piece o' cake now! Really, it is...But that will all end in THIRTEEN days!

Now that I am back to my cheerful self I have been able to thoroughly enjoy the sweet little boy that Conner is. His two favorite things to say are "Got it!" and "Maaaaama!" He just cracks me up, especially when I get a "Maaaaama!" after he just threw a ball at the back of my head, as if he is saying "goodness woman, why didn't you see that thing coming at you and catch it!?" I mean come on, of course I should have caught it :)

LOVE this picture! Isn't he precious? Brooks has really been blossoming these past couple of days, especially now that he is officially crawling. Its amazing how much they change once they get the motions down and are off. He is such a little talker too. When he is really happy you can hear his deep little "mmmmmmmmmhhhss" all through the house. He has got such a deep voice for such a little guy, but man when he is upset he goes from low to high really fast!

Creative Spark

Some babylegs for Brooks... if you have no clue what these are, they are like leggings with no bottom, which make for easy diaper changes. I use them specifically in the winter because it keeps their legs covered when their pants ride up while you are holding them. In 17 degree weather.

This is a Moby Wrap I made for a friend along with the carrying case.

A nursing shawl for same friend. Never seen one of these? You can check them out here (although those ones are not made by me)

Some felted wool balls I made for the Woman's Gift Exchange my church holds each year. I made 32 in total :)

These Marble Magnets were made by my friend Rebekah and myself, also for the Woman's Gift Exchange. Want to know how to make your own? Click here. They are super easy and a great gift.

I have had a busy couple of weeks sewing and being crafty and since Joseph is gone I thought I would share my fun, yet hard labor with you :)

Monday, December 8, 2008


Joseph will be home in SIXTEEN days.

Because of that fact I have been taking a little hiatus from the blogging world, so I apologize for no updates, cute pictures or even just a little bit of my sweet self. Why is it that the coming home of my husband has caused me to temporarily abandon the blogging world? Is it because I have been swamped with housework? Nope, my awesome mother took care of that while she was here last week. Overwhelmed with two sick children? Naw, I had pneumonia, they have a cold, piece o' cake!

Its the anticipation. And the not trying to think of the anticipation.

So far the anticipation of only sixteen more days has been harder then the last forty two days. Its getting harder to talk and think about him because sixteen days is so close yet still so far away, so I know have this neat big Joseph self in my head. If I try to take too much off of it at once and I am not alone, it gives me a swift punch to the stomach. I am not a very publicly emotional person, so I much rather take my time, alone and in the privacy of my own home. But it goes against the grain to put him up on a shelf. Missing him is natural and expected, but when I think of him too much, life stops, well life outside the boys that is. That life thankfully never stops. So then the anticipation and the not trying to anticipate try to take over my days. Hence the no blogging, because for some strange reason that requires me to think of him. And thinking of him makes a post that should only take 20 minutes to write take about and hour and a half. "sigh"
Ok, all of that was really a long version of " I love and miss my husband so much it hurts", but I like long versions. I actually don't think I know how to tell a short version without saying the long version first.


As I was writing I realized I had not posted about our temporary change of plans. For the time being Joseph had to change his specialty. In a year he will get to reapply and by that point the obstacles that where keeping him from his original specialty will have been cleared. We should be back on track unless we feel the new one is where God really intended for him to be all along. Instead of going straight to our original destination, we will be spending 4 months in a city in the Midwest (At least I believe it is considered the Midwest...). Because this is a public blog I do not want to share exact locations, but for the curious, cousin Nicole lived in this city not to many years ago.
Its up in the air exactly where we will be at the end of the four months, as choice of location for the next assignment is given out based on class rank. So if there are 30 people in the class there will be 30 assignments (some may be to the same location) and obviously some of those are going to be much better or preferable then other. Joseph's goal is to get either number one or two. I trust Joseph, being the crazy academic that he is, to do the best he can to make that goal, but more importantly I trust Him. Instead of feeling anxious, mad or even disappointed about these changes I find myself overjoyed by the fact that He is in control, that He knows my worries, my fears and my hopes and that I can anticipate and rest in the knowledge that He has us in the palm of His hand. And the palm of His hand is a pretty darned good place to be.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Slightly obsessed

I have a confession to make.
I am obsessed with Stephanie Meyer's Twilight series, absolutely obsessed. I try to blame my niece Larissa (hi Larissa :) ) because honestly if she hadn't mentioned how much she loved it to Joseph and I, then Joseph in a state of desperation for a good book, never would have picked it up, and then brought it home. In our house you know its a pretty darn good book if it actually makes it to the house. We have a tendency to be cheap and read most of "our" book at Barnes and Nobles, because we read so darn fast and those chairs are just so welcoming. Anyways, so Joseph brought home Twilight, then New Moon, Eclipse and because I loved the books so darn much Joseph, Larissa and I even went to the midnight release of Breaking Dawn. Because its slightly embarrassing I will not tell you how many times I have read each book, but lets just say its a little more then 3 times. Each. Sigh. Since Joseph left I have not picked up any of the books, its just too hard reading a great love story when your love story is 600 miles away. I love, love stories, mainly because they remind me of my own story, both with God and Joseph.
Sometimes I think we forget that our own love stories are just as great as those in books and movies because they are our stories. I think of all the moments Joseph and I have spent together, all the special things he has done to show me he loves me, how he daily sweeps me off my feet. That's why I love Twilight, because in Bella and Edwards love story I can see the rawness, passion and reality of my own. It makes me remember all the moments that I have had butterflies in my stomach and it definitely makes me ache to have him back home again. So for now I am going to go curl up with Eclipse and remember all my moments with Joseph.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Thankgiving

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! We had a nice subdued day here with my mom, who arrived in town to the rescue on Tuesday evening. It has been such a blessing to have her hear because I was running out of steam and need all the help I can get. Speaking of steam, I am losing it by the gallon at the moment, so I am going to leave you all with some pictures of the boys from today.

Everybody needs laundry basket drums

He was so smiley today! Finally no fevers (hmm, I think I forgot to mention he was sick also...)

"Hey Conner, will you give Brooksie a hug?" hmmm, ok I guess that counts as a hug

Yum! Applesauce and oatmeal

Those are trumpets every one, trumpets

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Mama's Sick

Good evening everyone. This post is going to be short and sweet. For the past four weeks I have had this terrible cough that kept coming and going, and I being who I am chose to ride it out. That is until today. Last night I started getting really nausea's, had the chills and was obviously running a fever, but silly me just thought it was a REALLY bad cold...ok ok I'm stubborn and kept telling myself that I cannot afford to be sick, I mean really I have two children to take care of. All the time. But I was a good girl and went to the doctor today, and came home with a diagnoses of walking pneumonia and really bad asthma, probably brought on by the whole fact that I have been sick for 4 weeks. I am now on antibiotics and have to go get a steroid kit for my lungs in 48hrs. I have also been fully chastised by all mothers involved :) And just so you know that I know the severity of my situation I was informed that if I had shown up yesterday that she would have sent me directly to the hospital. The only reason she didn't today is that after receiving a breathing treatment my oxygen levels went from 95% (bad) to 98% (better).
Please keep my family in prayers as I begin the road to recovery. I am exhausted and my children are not :)
Just because he makes my night brighter

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Goodbye friend

It can be really hard sometimes to start a post, especially when it is a hard subject for me to talk about. I mean do I just come out and say it or do I get all eloquent and make it perfect ? Well tonight I am going with just coming out and saying it because my heart is heavy and my head is drained, and well you know what they say about bandaids.
I found out earlier this evening that one of my best friends during High School passed away. In August. While I hold no grudge about the fact that I was just informed, it hurts to know that he has been gone for two and a half months and I had no idea. And that I was actually in CA, a couple miles away when his funeral was held. I know that ultimately it doesn't make a difference if I was there or not, but he was there for me through so much heart ache and pain. He knew me before Joseph, before kids and before I became a Christian. He knew me in a very raw form and I him. Before I had Christ I had Mike. So I sit here mourning him, mourning that rawness we had and mourning his loss to this world.
I ache for his wife and the pain she must be going through. They had just gotten married in April and where trying to have a baby. It definitely puts into perspective the ache I have for Joseph right now.
I wish I had something beautiful to say right now, but all I can think is "he's gone" and that in true fashion the last conversation we had was a not full of love and understanding.
So instead of something beautiful I will say "goodbye dear friend, goodbye".

Let me introduce you all to my good friend Mike App.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Our life in pictures part 5 (scroll down for part one if you want to go in order)

Good morning Brooksie!

Conner's friend Oliver came over to play. They were having a blast taking all the toys out of the toy box

And then getting into into it. You should have heard the giggles, they would have made a passel of teenage girls proud!

And then to finish this whole adventure off, an awesome picture Conner took of Oliver. I didn't even know it existed until I uploaded the pictures.

Our life in pictures part 4

"Quick! He's holding still, snap the picture!"

Getting ready to make his airplane fly

Now we move on to today. The day started with an early bath because someone has something disgusting and stinky waiting for me this morning.

And the only way to cure that was to throw him in...not that he minded much.

Until it was time to get out that is.

You probably already figure this out, but time for part 5!

Our life in pictures part 3

Later that evening we decided to cuddle up in mama's bed. I think I caught Conner mid flip, but Brooks is chill as usual. I mean, with an older brother with as much energy as Conner, who needs to move when all you have to do is watch him to get tired?

"Are you taking the picture mama?" "Yes I am Conner, now will you please hold still?"

"Ok, but only for a second"... notice Brooks has barely moved...

"Now don't Malachi's boots look smashing on me?"

Taking a picture of this child is exhausting, he moves so much and would rather take the picture then be in it, so most come out like this...almost perfect but a little blurry, or no Conner in the picture at all...

Now to part 4... I promised you lots of pictures :)

Our life in pictures part 2

The next morning Brooks decides to show off what he should look like when he is crawling...but alas he is just faking us all out because he is still a pro at the army crawl

Then Conner steals the camera and takes a picture of Aunt Rebekah, which I am sure she will be thrilled to find out I posted, but I think that she is beautiful

"Mama?!"...I get this call at least once a day from Brooks room, since his crib is Conner's favorite place to hangout, along with all his toys.

Which he then insists that Brooks needs to come in and play with him. Brooks is still not so sure about this, since you know, cribs are for sleeping...

But then he hams it up for mama even though his brother is being a tornado in the crib as I snap the picture (exampled by the bumper being all wacky)

Now for part three!

Our life in pictures part 1

I believe that it is way past time for me to share some pictures with you. So I thought I would do a day in the life sort of thing, since I keep getting asked how I am "doing it" all right now, you know with being alone and all. Well the plain answer is I just am, but the answer in pictures is much more poetic and meaningful, for I am "doing it" because God has given me grace and because He has given me these boys... who wouldn't do it for them?

Every Saturday Joseph's parents take us out to lunch or dinner, and the only thing that keeps Brooks from trying to eat all of our dinners (which he is not allowed to do) is these teething biscuits. Which are extremely messy.

So then we go home and take a bath, and eat some fresh water sushi, because I am sure you all can tell that that purple thing in Brooks hand is a fish...

Then we goof around and laugh a lot, which isn't hard when you have Conner as your resident goof ball

Sushi and alphabet soup? Awesome mom!

Now its time to scroll up to part two since blogger only lets me upload 5 pictures per post and I have a few more then 5 to share.

Monday, November 17, 2008


I apologize for not giving any updates over the past 5 days, but to be honest, I have just not had it in me. Overall everything is doing fine and dandy in the Sutherland world, but its been a hard few days, Days that have made me want to crawl under my covers and stay there, but alas there are two handsome little boys who don't think that's as good an idea as I do. So instead I have been chugging along and trusting in God's provisions, and let me tell you, He has provided. Sometimes its small things, like a friend dropping off some Clementines because she was thinking of me, or other times its large things, like two phone calls from Joseph in a 4 day period, with one of them being a whopping 58 minutes and 7 seconds long. And yes, I counted every second. He has also provided me with endurance because as long as I rely on Him, I have all the endurance I need. I'm still working on the relying on Him part though.


Joseph is doing great. He says he is working hard and falling into a routine, which has been both good and bad. Now that things have slowed down he has more time to think, and time to think means he has time to remember some of the things he is missing. While he is gone Brooks is learning to crawl and Conner is beginning to talk in small sentences, and I am growing too. I am becoming more confident in myself, trusting that I have the knowledge and capability to run my household while my husband is gone. Even to run it when he is home, which for me is a big deal. I mean I have always taken care of my children, and Joseph too, but now I am trusting myself with more then just them. Its been a painful process, but God provides.
Ok, back to Joseph. He is officially schedualed to graduate on Chrstmas Eve! It is so wonderful to finally have a date to set my eyes on, something to count down to. But with it comes the reality that I am moving in 7 weeks. While I am excited, I am also sad. I love it here, which if you told me 5 years ago that I would say that, I would probably have called you crazy. But I do. There are so many wonderful people that I am going to miss, and right now its hard to not dwell in that. So all you wonderful people out there, know that I love you and that I a trying really hard to not miss you already.


I need to stop blogging at midnight. One because I am never sure if what I am writing actually flows, and two, because I am to tired to upload pictures. So you are going to have to trust that my children are still as adorable as ever and that I will make my busy self post something earlier so that you all can ogle at them.


Congratulations Tim and Sarah on the birth of your beautiful Eliza! The Sutherland clan cannot wait to meet her :)

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

I love Wednesdays

Wednesdays are a good day in the Sutherland household. At 10:00 in the morning I get to run out in the freezing cold to my mailbox and pull out my beloveds letter. I love getting a letter from Joseph, what I don't love on the other hand is finding out that those in charge of his division have decided to do a "special" graduation for them on...Christmas Eve. Because you know, its easy to get to Chicago, in the snow, on Christmas Eve. Are they planing on getting all 84 men in his division plane tickets for that night also? I am trying to be excited that we finally have a date (although its not set in stone yet), but I was really praying for the 19th to be the day. I mean it is just so much more convenient, and earlier, and I like both of those things.
Otherwise he is doing alright. Every other night he has to get up in the middle of the night and shovel snow for an two hours, so if you happen to be up in the middle of the night ( or have a late evening if you are in CA) then please throw up some warmth and patience prayers for him. Apparently they really like to do things in the night there, as he also has a two hour watch he has to do and gets woken up to iron uniforms for thirty minutes in a rotating schedule along with the snow shoveling, then he is up at 5:30am.
He says the hardest part is the IT (intensive training) they do when someone is being "stupid". This is where you are made to exercise until you can't breath, move your limbs or until someone passes out (although he claims that he thinks the guy faked it). Sounds like fun, huh? Although he has yet to be the one to bring this on, he is in a team environment and its an equal opportunity setup. He's says they are not quite there yet, so there is another area you could pray for him.
Only other news was about getting antibiotic shots by an air gun...I had to stop for a moment at that one. Each recruit has to walk up to this box, place there right are against it, shot, then left arm , shot...by an air gun. Oh and after that they were all treated to a "peanut butter" shot, you know, a shot full of antibiotics so thick that it feels like peanut butter going in. Poor guy couldn't sleep on his left side for 2 days.


In other news, Brooks has been running a fever all day. He spent most of the day sleeping, and the rest of it curled up in my arms. Poor guy.

Conner got to go out with our friend Brandon today for some guy time. Unfortunately it didn't get to last to long because it started to rain, but Conner had a blast. Thank you Brandon!


Alright folks, I am off to bed! Peace be with you all.

Monday, November 10, 2008

One postbox coming right up!

I think Conner and I have had a break through on the whole dada is gone thing. First he is still convinced that his dad is currently in a baby (because you know Navy...baby), whenever I ask him where dada is he says with a quizzical look on his face "Dada in the baby?". So how do you explain the Navy and basic training to a two in a half year old? Well you take him to the postbox of course! See normally I drop Joseph's letters off when I am on my way to run an errand since I have to pass right past the postbox, while the boys wait in the car. Well on Saturday we were out for a walk with Rebekah, Malachi and Jonah, so we decided to head up to the postbox so that I could let Conner drop it in. When we got there I lifted him up and showed him how to pull on the door to make it open, then I gave him the letter to drop in. As the letter dropped we said a prayer for Joseph, sent our love and said goodbye. As we were walking away Conner kept turning around and yelling "Bye Dada!" to the postbox, with an "I love you" thrown in there once or twice. Now every time we pass the postbox Conner does the same thing with a big smile on his face. It has also gotten him to ask and talk about Joseph more. We now eat dinner with Joseph's picture next to Conner (he brought it over himself) and I believe I caught Conner trying to play catch with the same picture earlier... so apparently the postbox was just what he needed. Now if only I can convince him Joseph is NOT in a baby...
"Oh the NAVY mom, now I get it! Wait, whats the Navy?"